All I Want For Christmas

1.  An uninterrupted 2 hours in which to wrap gifts while watching “Love Actually.” I don’t want to hear a word against this movie, mostly because I can’t actually defend it, except to say that it fills me with holiday joy and if that airport scene at the end is blatantly manipulative, well, I’m not made of stone, even if you are.

2.  One more year when my kids (10 and 11) believe in Santa.  Yes, I know they’re getting a little long in the tooth for this sort of thing, and are probably humoring their dad and me in the hopes we’ll be touched by their faith and reward it with more loot. Only last year did they start to exhibit signs of doubt.  (Overheard: sister informing brother “Mom and Dad are totally the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny.” Brother: “I know, right? It’s so obvious that only Santa’s real.”  Troubled silence. Sister: “RIGHT.” )

3.  The gift of being organized.  Can someone order that for me?

4.  Napkin rings.

5.   40: A Doonesbury Retrospective.  Here’s a love much easier to defend: I grew up reading and re-reading The Doonesbury Chronicles before I was old or smart enough to really understand the politics.  But it fed my Californian, pre-adolescent romanticizing of all things East Coast and adult—the swirling leaves and snowy landscapes of Walden Puddle, life in college and beyond, a world of boyfriends and girlfriends and dorms and apartments, where people take cross-country motorcycle trips and join communes.  For a while I could tell you everything there was to know about Mike, Mark, Zonker, and Joanie, but we all fell out of touch when I moved to the comics-free zone of the New York Times.  From my occasional glimpses of the strip online or in print, they seem to have aged a bit—but they’re still as funny as ever.  I can’t wait to catch up.

6.  The reinstatement of every stand-alone book review section eliminated over the past few years.  I’m not the details person on this one, I’m more Yul Brynner in “The King and I,” waving a hand around and demanding that someone Make it So.

7.  The voluntary and spontaneous reunion of every teenage boy’s jeans’ waistband with his actual waist.

8.  Someone to explain to me why, why in God’s name you’d want to install giant holes in your perfectly nice earlobes until they touch your shoulders.  Stop doing that, youth of today, plastic surgery cash cows of tomorrow!

9.  A new yoga mat.

10.  A happy, healthy new year for everyone I know and for everyone I wish I knew and for everyone else, too.

One Comment

  1. Posted December 13, 2010 at 5:32 pm | Permalink | Reply

    Great list.
    More interesting than the list I got from my nieces and nephews.

    And I love your very own imprint logo!
    Fancy.

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